Tokyo nights, Omiya daze

The keyboard is mightier than the sword. In my hands, at least, because I couldn`t lift a sword. It seems my little missives have been upsetting a friend of mine (and perhaps more!) who thought I was writing about him when complaining about the low-grade male compatriots blighting our country`s image in Japan (this one is about you, but those ones weren`t). I`ve been desperate for company in my time in Japan, but never to the point to actually stooping to spending time with these losers. People who have seen me when I`ve not been paid to be there can generally assume they make the grade and have a Zoe-approved kite mark. Sorry for any confusion or upset. Still, it is hardly the time to be complaining and the kite mark can always be withdrawn.

Rachel came to enjoy my penultimate weekend in Tokyo and we did a fair bit of sight-seeing, perhaps more than I have managed in the past few months alone. On Saturday night, we went into Shibuya to go to a hip hop club and met up with Riaz, Sean and some others, although we only met briefly and stared across a crowded Hub as we couldn`t get a table to fit everyone in. Edwin then somehow convinced everyone to traipse over to Roppongi to meet him to drink JD and coke in the street, although everyone had initially planned to go out in Shibuya. Edwin is silently obstinate and no one so far (aside from, of course, me) has crossed him. I do hope his time comes. He`s a smug little shit. I then forced everyone to go into quite an awful bar which claimed to have a Russian theme, but only had a couple of Eastern European hookers holed up in a corner. It also had a group of young indie lads to whom a pair of Japanese groupies had attached themselves, imagining they were in a bad. One of them tried to tell Yoriko they were in a band too, of course she believed them, but their mate dropped them in it not too much later. She was still smitted with the neckkerchiefs and shaggy hair. I thought they looked like a pack of terriers.

After a couple of hours on Costa del Roppongi watching girls with no brains rump-shake to the death over one fairly kakkoii Japanese boy, before flicking their hair in our faces to warn us off the terriers, we decided to head off to Shibuya. I just couldn`t bear to waste another minute on a low-grade Greek island holiday, so off we went to Shibuya for a night of hip hop in Harlem. Sadly, I had to hand my camera over when we arrived, so I couldn`t snap any of the wide boys on display. I necked with a young judo student who wants to be a PE teacher when he grows up (he was VERY young, though he can legally drink) and he pointed out one of Japan`s best K1 fighters in the club. I tried to surrepticiously take a snap on my camera phone, but just blinded him with the flash and chickened out. I succeded in scaring him downstairs to the dancefloor, so I took the small boy downstairs and introduced him to his hero. We had to wait in the club for the first train, so loafed out at 5am and headed to the convenience store for some sustinence. I also managed to pick up an enormous cardboard box outside the store, the binmen taking it away refusing to let me have the dirty one and giving me a far cleaner one to cart back to Omiya. Yoriko was a bit bemused by me making a spectacle of myself, but it paid off. I can now pack almost all my worldly goods into one box. I can also fit a nice Japanese umbrella in there, which I was hoping for. They are far nicer than British ones.

On Sunday, we flitted between Shibuya and Shinjuku, where I dragged my laptop only to be told that I didn`t have a virus, I just didn`t know how to use the thing. Fortunately, my little beauty is very light, so it didn`t matter too much. We passed a street festival in Shibuya, which was a bit random as it`s usually one of the liveliest places in Tokyo. In the midst of the throng, we spotted some boys in thongs, very common at Japanese festivals and something that no one has yet been able to explain. I can understand the desire to throw off every item that decency allows in the Japanese summer heat, but why keep on your jacket? Rachel also got to lift the cart, a kind man who looked very much like a Dr Suess baddie ushering her in and pushing his friends out to make way.

On Monday, I broke the news to Yoshiko that I was leaving, which sparked tears. She was a bit emotional already as last week she`d been home to mark the anniversary of her father`s death. She travelled back to her home town to pray and visit his grave, something she generally can`t do as her family live so far away. I also told Mina, who was lovely about it and is trying to take the day off work to drive me to the airport. I have only met her a handful of times, but she was insisting on playing some part of my exit strategy. She also treated me to a fantastic meal at my favourite izakaya and told me a story about her friend from Okinawa who blames her move into Tokyo`s polluted atmosphere for the sudden sprouts of nasal hair she`s suffering! I`ll miss Mina, I think she and Yoriko could have been great friends and it`s a shame didn`t have longer to get to know them - though they might have ended up getting on my nerves, most people out here have at some point.

One of the teachers I work with has spent every available minute in the past week boring me until my ears bleed, boasting about all manner of insignificant things, from how lucky he was to go to a grammar school, to describing how he teaches every class. I was vaguely interested when he first told me these things, but he has yet to add anything new to his loop and it is driving me mad. Teaching seriously exaggerates a person`s sense of their own importance. It could be an act of kindness. I wonder if he is patronising me so painfully so I don`t miss Japan when I get home. I can`t see that I will. A few people seem to be conspiring to make my last few days as annoying as possible.

Not Jerry though. Last night I popped into the George to say hello and ended up staying until too late, drinking pink champagne and lamenting the state of Brits abroad woth George. The night was fairly hazy as the gin and champagne mixed, but I vaguely remember me and George teasing him about wearing his cowboy hat for riding on Sunday. If you`re reading this, Jerry, you have to.

Today was obviously quite difficult workwise, but the kids have tests all week. I`ve been threatening to deduct points for talking and been sitting down writing letters. There are so many ways to skive in teaching, it`s genius.